To the detriment of yourself: 6 myths about the self -harm


Selfharm is a deliberate causing damage, causing pain, emotional or physical. Some see in cuts and burns an attempt by suicide, others – demonstrative behavior. We asked the psychologist Nastasu Krysko to comment on the myths associated with auto -aggression.

What makes people of different ages, and above all adolescents, hurt themselves? Such non -trivial dialogue with their body is chosen by those who do not know how to other, safely to relieve mental stress, cope with their emotions in difficult life situations.

“Selfharm has always been a way out for me, from seven years, probably. Then I did not know what it was called, but punished myself. For extra food, for tears. I was a very chubby child, so I could starve for weeks because I allowed myself to eat chocolate. Then there were more and more problems, and punishment – everything is stricter. I deprived myself of sleep, food, beat myself, cut it … I talked about my problem to everyone. I asked for help, but I was put up by an idiot asking me “. (Valya, 17 years old)

“I have been engaged in Selfharm for almost eleven years. I can’t remember how it all started. At an early age, I basically punished myself for the mismatch of parental expectations, but I had a lot of reasons for self -overioning. Among them are a drinking member of the family, a sense of injustice and regret because I can never help everyone … Now it’s hard for me to imagine myself without blades in a case of a phone and several dozen scars all over my body, not to mention a hundred scars … Do not romantication. This is not beautiful at all … ”(Matvey, 15 years old)

These are fragments of confessions that a student of the European gymnasium Barbar Bogantsev published on her website. In creating a resource that honestly and clearly telling about self -hut, she had personal interest: “I have friends and acquaintances, prone to self -confusion, and I know how unpleasant it is to feel my helplessness and not understand what help I can provide them. I hope the project will come in handy to other people with a similar problem “. Barbara collected on her website several established opinions on self -destructive behavior. We asked to comment on these myths of a teenage psychologist Nastasu Krysko.

1. Selfharm is always a suicide attempt

No not always. A person can cause damage to himself with another purpose: to cope with the difficult for him or her experiences, traumatic situations, for example, violence or bullying, failures in some significant field, as well as with the inability to control his life. Or wanting to punish yourself for something.

American psychologist Thomas Joyner, a recognized expert in the field of suicidal behavior, drew attention to: the longer a person practices selfharm, the lower he has a fear of death, that is, a kind of “addiction” or, in a scientific, “desensis”. Among the events that lead to a decrease in the fear of death, also distinguish psychological injuries of childhood and serious diseases that cause suffering. It is always important to clarify the person himself (when he agreed to speak on this topic) his motives and intentions.

2. Selfharm is when the veins

are cut

There are many ways of self -overhaul. Some people resort to different options, and some use the same way constantly. The basis of any self -confusion is an intentional harm to yourself with a specific purpose (self -regulation, distraction, punishment, and so on). In addition to cuts of different parts of the body, there are also such methods of self -confusion as:

  • overeating and malnutrition,
  • Biting yourself,
  • burns,
  • sticking objects into oneself,
  • Blows against the wall,
  • Deliberate overdose,
  • Excessive physical activity in order to harm yourself,
  • Rubbing hair,
  • Participation in fights in which there will certainly be injured.

Some researchers distinguish the so-called emotional selfharm: it may be to specifically angry someone, provoke to shout at you in response. Another way is to intentionally enter into a relationship in which you don’t want to be, to be with those with whom you do not want to be, have sex, when you don’t want to, do not give yourself time with those whom you love, punishing yourself.